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You know what I mean when I talk about those people who seem to have everything together: they know exactly who they are, exactly where they’re headed, and are miraculously able to balance every part of their lives — from work, to school, to spiritual growth, to relationships, to personal health, to well-being. Of course, no one is actually “perfect” — some people just seem to be. And if you’re one of those people, that’s great. Celebrate it. It’s worth being proud of, especially if it’s taken you so long to get there.
But for some of us, things don’t seem to be coming together AT ALL. As in nada. For some of us, it’s like the puzzle pieces of our lives are still scattered, nothing falling into place. It’s like the dots are sporadic, not yet connecting. It’s like every door we try to enter slams shut in our face, or all our ventures wind up being dead-ends. It’s like every shoe we try on doesn’t fit, or every opportunity we take is like squeezing ourselves into a role we were never meant for.
Some of us have found clarity and direction; others have found nothing but murkiness. Some of us have found lasting joy and peace; others just feel persistent restlessness. We all go through different seasons. We all have different life stories. This is natural.
SO WHAT CAN I SAY ABOUT ALL THIS?
Not much, truthfully. Only to have faith that one day things will be different.
That one day all of this will matter in the end and not a single detail will be insignificant. That one day, all those dead-ends will redirect us to the paths we were meant to take. That one day those closed doors will lead us to other doors we were meant to enter. That one day all those scattered dots will connect into a beautiful picture in hindsight.
One day we will discover that the restlessness in our hearts was an inner refusal to settle for less than God Himself. One day we’ll realize that the times we refused to settle for people/opportunities that just weren’t “right” for us were worth all the people/opportunities that were. And one day we’ll learn that the uncertainty we dealt with was God’s way of teaching us how to trust in Him.
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Celine Diaz: Real Talk 
Hi Celine,
This is a very well-written post; thank you for writing it.
You wrote that you would enjoy comments, and since I always appreciated comments on my own writing, I thought I would humor your request.
I think it’s important we make important distinctions on what success and failure means. People who are well put together, or at least appear to be so, usually are only so because they have an intended goal in mind; they know what they want. If you read that out loud, it sounds silly: “I know what I want.” That sentence sounds redundant. But the difficulty is certainly understandable; our age is an age of distraction and it can be difficult to navigate through the labyrinth of possibilities. In this case, too many choices is counterproductive.
And this is why we must remember that the customary notions of success and failure are based exclusively on a particular result. For example: I go to school to get a job. I didn’t get a job. Therefore going to school was a failure.
This would be a really one-sided, and therefore incorrect way, of looking at going to school however. It is the utilitarian view of things: if it’s not useful, then we shouldn’t do it. But if we prescribe to this view, we would lose so much: art, poetry, etc.
There is so much to life then just what we can get out of it. In fact, Aristotle says that the highest wisdom is not useful for anything else other than itself. viz. knowing for the sake of knowing.
I mention this because failures contribute much to our growth, not only in the whole “Whatever doesn’t kill me makes me stronger,” but also in the way that failures teach us much about humility, much about courage, much about trust and confidence in God. And this is a precious jewel because living a virtuous life is what gives us true happiness: Blessed are the poor in Spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God.
If nothing falls into place according to me, it falls into place for me, because God arranges everything, and He always does so with my best interest at heart, namely Himself, who is Goodness Himself.
in Christ Jesus and Mary,
a brother in Christ
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Hello,
Wow. First of all, thank you for writing such an in-depth comment. I am touched that you took the time to write all of this (it could be a full blog post in itself!). Honestly, your words came at just the right time. I’ve been pondering about the same things lately—how some endeavors are worth going for simply because they ARE, and that in some cases, the outcome is secondary or even irrelevant! Maybe “value” just can’t be measured by something so limited. That’s why I was struck by your phrase: “There is so much to life than just what we can get out of it.” Through that lens, everything matters and nothing is insignificant—even the things that seem like failures.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Keep doing so, because many other people also benefit. God bless!
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